For Hoffman

I lost a friend last month.
His name was Ron. The service I went to was attended by over 300 people who loved him. He was an actor, among other things. One of the most naturally funny people I will probably ever know.

I have known his big brother, Rick, my entire life as he is my uncle Larry's best friend. And as I started to take acting classes in the mid 80's at Mt. San Jacinto College, Ron had already moved on. If anyone took an acting class at that particular time at the college, you knew of him. He was an example that was often talked about in class. Not only was he good, but he was successful. And even though I hadn't actually met the guy (yet) to my classmates at the time I was like; "Oh yeah, I know him."

We first met when we did a production of West Side Story at the college. He was cast as the detective and I was a shark girl. We put two and two together backstage. "Hey, you're Ricks brother!" "Hey, you're Larry's niece." He is one of the only people I have ever heard refer to my uncle as "Lawrence" so I immediately thought he was a funny guy.

So, years go by, and I was asked to take a part in a production of Pump Boys and Dinettes. Fun show. This particular cast, which included Rick, Ron, and Larry, had performed this show before. They had it down. I was the new kid. It wasn't until after a few rehearsals that I realized that about 50% of the stuff that was coming out of Ron's mouth wasn't in the script. Some of the BEST stuff, came right out of his head. As an actor who doesn't really pride myself on my improvisation skills, I had to keep up. But it didn't matter because Ron had a way of making everything funny.

In the second act, Ron sang a song called , "The night Dolly Parton was almost mine." There was about 16-24 bars in the middle of the song that was instrumental. It was a two-step. I made the suggestion to him that maybe he and I could dance a little in the break. To this he said, "That's a really good idea except for one thing....I don't dance." So, I let it go. The next night, right before the song he came up to me and said, "Just follow me, we're gonna wing it"

The time came for the dance break and I got up and he grabbed me. He stomped through it; step together, step together, step together, step. Then he whipped me around and whipped me back, so I tried to spin him. He didn't..quite...make it around. Then he smacked me hard in the shoulder and said, (in character) "I told ya....I don't dance." So..I smacked him back and made my way back to my stool. And that's the way we did it every night.

Later on that evening, I said "Hey Ron, I kinda like our dance/fight." He then said that according to the script, his character has a love/hate relationship with women so it was really the only way it could be done. The truth was, he wasn't just "wingin it". He had thought about it, and it wasn't above him to point out his shortcomings as a dancer in order to get the laugh. That little dance break became one of my favorite moments in the show.

After the show was over, I saw Ron, off and on, when I attended church in Hemet. He was on the worship team. He often came up to me after service and asked me how things were going. I had just moved into town. He knew I was looking for work. It wasn't until the third or fourth time he asked me how the job search was going that I realized, he had been praying for me. I had written my prayer request down months ago on a little prayer card in the lobby. Ronnie was one of the people who had been taking my requests and praying for me. It was then, that I knew, he was the real deal. He wasn't just at the church going through the motions in the church band...he really cared about people.

Sitting at his memorial, hearing all the stories....he cared about a LOT of people. He touched many lives. I can honestly say, I've never laughed so hard at a memorial in my life. He was a giver. That's what made him a great actor. But it's also what made him a great guy.

So, rest in peace friend. You are missed. But I know we will see each other again one day and, hopefully, by then, your dance skills will have improved.