The truth... and you're welcome

Let me just say this.  Right away. I'm not into participation trophies. You know how schools and sports teams give recognition trophies?? It is counter productive. I work in the youth theatre arena. I know, first hand that theatre can be hard, and cruel, and brutally honest and at times. unfair. I understand that many parents want to involve their kids in this element to "just have fun" with no intentions of going any further with it.....and that's fine. But for me, as a director, and as someone who has seen what it's  like in the real professional theatre world, I'm sorry, but I feel an obligation to be honest. Theatre is hard. It's extremely competitive, and you have to have a thick skin if you want to continue in this art. I am all about encouragement and building confidence, but sometimes that doesn't seem to be enough in this politically correct world. I have great passion in teaching kids and building confidence and giving constructive criticism. However, I am not one to give credit where credit isn't due. You have to impress me. I feel as though my expectations are mild compared to the REAL theatre world. I want to help and teach, but I am simply not going to build false hope in any kid, I feel that is cruel. Someone has to tell the truth. I guess it's me. This is, indeed, kind of a strange calling. But I have always prided my self on my honesty.
  Of course every parent thinks that thier kid is a star. We have all seen American Idol right? Sometimes it's not true. Fortunately, I get to work with kids when they are young and they have untapped potential. Singing lessons, acting lessons, speech or improv classes can help them before their bad habits take over. But even I am not a miracle worker. Kids who are naturally gifted STILL need to work at it. That's simply the reality. I guess I am posting this to state that I understand the struggle. It's hard. Being an actor or a musical performer is hard! It takes years of experience and dedication. That's all I'm getting at. Be ready for it. If this is something you really want to do, be ready. I hope you love auditioning, because that's the bulk of what you will do. Every once in a while you will get cast and that is the reward. Love perfoming. Love perfecting your craft through acting classes or dance or improv or whatever you do best. This is the true life of a performer in this world today. Get used to it. Enjoy it, celebrate it, and love it. That's the only way you will be happy with it. Believe me, I know.

Just thinking

For a long time, I was wondering what the heck I was supposed to do with my life. What was going to make a difference? What was going to be fulfilling? As I got older, it seemed to gnaw on me. I have this theatrical education, and no day job. It's kind of depressing. The artist suffers. I think that's how it is supposed to be unfortunately. In a perfect world, and if I all of a sudden became financially   independent, I would build my own theatre. I would make a commune for actors and artists to explore and create. I would also buy a big piece of property and build kennels for homeless dogs. It would be an animal and artist paradise. That would be heaven on earth for me.
     I fell into directing and teaching theatre unintentionally. I considered myself an actor, solely. But, I have found that, especially when the parts and opportunities for me started getting scarce, God said, " Hey....try this, I think you will like it.."  I was always kinda bossy and I felt like I knew more than my directors anyway. Haha! No seriously, I had a diva problem in college. But that was a sign. Acting is great and wonderful and I love it, but directing.....researching, living with a script, ( I mean like REALLY living with a script) is what I do best. Research is a true love of mine. So, the cliché is true "What I really want to do is direct."
     I had some brilliant directors to learn from. I have performed in many productions and for some reason, even though I loved it, it didn't fit quite perfectly. I was always wanting to be more. I still would never give up a great role, and I still audition for things, but there is a nervousness that appears when I act that isn't there when I direct. It's different... wonderfully so, and you can't even compare the two. Stress is still involved either way but it is really like two completely opposite ideals. We are fighting for the same truth from opposite ends.
  It's also ironic that I, as a woman who never had children of my own, have so many now through theatre. It's a gift to be able to see these kids blossom and grow. I feel like a mom. I have like 54 kids right now. It's incredibly fulfilling. And I don't have to take them home. Seriously though, I am thankful to the parents who allow me to spend time with their kids and teach them about theatre. I love to encourage them and see them grow. Nothing makes me happier than seeing a parent bursting with pride at the performance that their kid is giving. Seeing them break out of their shell and becoming an artist, ....that's my job, to help them do that. What a blessing.